Peril On The Screen: Thankskilling

WARNING: THIS REVIEW CONTAINS MATURE CONTENT.

If not for the fantastic addition of Peril on the Screen to the (R)eaders (I)mbibing (P)eril challenge, I might never have had the joy of watching Thankskilling.

Imagine, if you will, a homicidal turkey, an ancient curse, and college students who each fit into their social stratum cliche. Perhaps you are imagining a hot mess. Yes, you are right.

I will not lie, as I was adding movies to my Netflix instant queue, I thought the campier the better. As I have no trouble mercilessly mocking a movie, I am an MST3K fan, after all (Crow <3).

So what, pray tell are my thoughts on this movie?

For one thing, the very first thing you see is boobs. I know, I know, I know. I am an adult, these things should not faze me. I should be used to nakey times, as I went through the joys of state college. NOPE. I practically spit out my wine. Then, of course, I called my boyfriend in the room. BTW, boobsie gets slayed first, with a rather sexist quip, which I won’t repeat here. Then we are treated to the joy of a super long opening credits scene.

A group of college students decide to drive home for Thanksgiving break. Along the way they wind up in some cursed town. Some curse raises the homicidal turkey after 505 years. The turkey then proceeds to kill people.

The acting was fairly terrible, but oh so funny. I mean, I laughed through the entire movie, and I watched it sober. Now, imagine how funny it would have been after taking a shot for every time the redneck kid did something red neck, or every time the ‘slut’ did something ‘slutty’. Or if I had taken a sip for every time I questioned why the actors weren’t wearing make up or their clothing choice. There are some genuinely funny moments in this, but on the level of someone who laughs at stupid things, which yes, that is me. Hello, 12 year old humor right here. For instance, there is one line which my boyfriend and I continually giggle at after watching the movie, ‘we gotta kill that cock-blocking turkey.’ I know, it’s sort of funny out of context. OH oh oh, and these kids are SO TSTL, that like, there is a scene where the turkey kills someone and is then wearing that person’s face AND the kids assume the turkey is that person. OH MY GOD. I mean, that was definitely on purpose and I think there to get laughs. But still, ahhh, my brain, it hurts.

However, this movie is only one hour and five minutes. The turkey is probably on screen for like 20 minutes, which obvi are the best 20 minutes of the entire movie. If you have a 40 oz or a six pack of beer, then this is totally a great movie for you to watch. As, I can imagine the LOLz will come much more easily.

Here is where you can watch Thankskilling — IF you have Netflix.

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April (Books&Wine)

April is in her 30s and created Good Books And Good Wine. She works for a non-profit. April always has a book on hand. In her free time she can be found binge watching The Office with her husband and toddler, spending way too much time on Pinterest or exploring her neighborhood.

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